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i was an ordinary one in our batch.. had no horns..i never smoked... once in a while.. very rarely.. one beer...
i was simple..
she was also.. thats y i started observing her... journalism was deep in me.. i wanted to do works regarding the latest political crimes .. and wanted to be most known crime reporter.. .. my ambitions and skills even though never matched.. i kept on dreaming about it..
i had no one else in this world.. ya .. can be said as orphan.. but i had sponsors.. i was having good grades from the church school.. may be thats the reason why i never bothered to see humans cry or enjoy.. i was ignoring the fact called emotions..
but she was pretty.. she was as tall as me .. but a little less.. and fair in color,, had a good sense of humour which i found out very lately.. beautifull eyes.. and the rest i dont want to say.. i loved her .. that is enough..
old man laughed .. when he just said the word love..
"y r u laughing.. "
" nothing.. u continue",
" ah.. i never had the guts to come up and speak .. but we exchanged glances all the time.. we smiled .. we communicated through minds.. all my imagination..
one fine morning .. i was walking down the steps.. and some body just touched me.. i looked back and saw RENUKA.. she was also alone and she was giving her beautiful smile... she was pointing to my back .. and tried to take out a paper pinned on my shirt by those beings .. called friends...
she took that paper peice and gave it to me.. even though no body saw that scene.. every should have seen " DUMP " written on my back..she just gave tat to me and tried to flew away.. but i blocked that intension.. " i said a thank you"..
"oh.. come on boy"... cut the crap.. i know the rest of the story.. she might have said an Yes .. and bla bla ... dont be a girl... cut these shits and tell me in a short format" old man yelled at me...
" where are u going.. " i asked
" am a busy person .. am running many business... just by sitting here" he said
"" businees ... and in jail.. " i laughed aloud
"" ok .. dont mind.. so y u killed her"
" look old man i never killed any one" .. " i cant kill her"
" then y did accept everything in the court"
" ha ha ,, when i lost my mind.. when i found myself in a lost situation.. no more reason to live.. "
" you just admitted.. idiot.. do u know who killed her.. and that man is roaming out freely now.." he again yelled at me..
" am not interested in freedom.. when there is no point of living"
" look.. i dont have parents.. or close friends.. i just had a lover .. she got married to a guy.. and i lost her too in that way.. am a looser as a whole.. so better to die.. i thought like that .. "
" you are such an ass hole... you dont know why / what life is.. any how i need you .. i will make u good.. will you follow me.. ?? " now he started asking questions ...
" i will .. but am happy here.. i will help you.. thats all" i said
" ok.. here is the plan .. i will make you come out of this hell.. and rest you will follow.. "
" but why.. y me??" i asked..
" you dont want to live .. right... "
" yes"
" ok i wil help you die"" just help me in some aspects.. after a few period of time.." " you wil be my best".. may be his last words of the day..
the day went on as usual.. work .. breaking hard rocks.. gardening.. kitchen.. etc etc.. jail is so busy .. and am earning also..
old man always held his book with him.. and i always wanted to see whats inside that .. some times my reporter just pops up...
never mind.. i will read that one day...
in between i was called to office ..
there i saw many kaki.. sticks .. guns..
silence prevailed..
dont know why i was called..
contd.....